Conspiracy Corner

FOUR THINGS REVIEWED: WK 12: Cowboys

Posted by The BEAST on 2025/11/24
Posted in: Coaching, Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, Defense, Four Things, NFC East, Offense, Players, playoffs, Rants, Reviews, Rivals, Special Teams, stats. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment
Head Coach Nick Sirianni, not assigning proper accountability

HEY look, another collapse!

EAGLES 21 – Cowboys 24

 

EAGLES STATS:

Passing: QB Jalen Hurts (27/39 – 69.2% – 289 – 1 – 0)

Rushing: QB Jalen Hurts (7 – 33 – 4.7 – 2 – 0)

Receiving: WR A.J. Brown (10 – 8 – 110 – 13.7 – 1)

Drive Killer: S Reed Blankenship (TD: 0/Int: 1/ FR: 0/ 4th down stops: 0/ FF: 0)

Sack Leader: LB Nakobe Dean (Sacks: 1.0/ FF: 0/ Tackles: 5)

Special Teams Ace: NA

****

I hear you asking, “What about all the stuff that stats don’t reveal?” Well, that’s the reason for these Four Things articles. It’s to point out what we need to address BEFORE the game. Then AFTER the game, there’s a no-bullshit assessment of whether or not the Eagles did any of what they needed to do, to ensure the win.

So how much of what I mentioned in Four Things: COWBOYS did the Eagles actually get around to doing? Well let’s see:

1) QB Hits Are Hip: All game long we got just 6 hits and 1 sack on the Cowboys QB. SO we didn’t affect his delivery of the ball much at all (NOT DONE)

2) Feed Our Big Dawgs: WR A.J. Brown had 110 receiving yards, and WR DeVonta Smith (11 – 6 – 89 – 14.8 – 0) got close to the century mark as well. However, the offensive approach was passive, and the run game was essentially shelved for this game. RB Saquon Barkley (10 – 22 – 2.2 – 0 – 1 / 8 – 7 – 52 – 7.4 – 0) was targeted 8 times as a receiver, but the play-calling abandoned the run, while holding a 21 point lead. (DONE)

3) Make ‘em Run: Idea was to to get their defensive line to chase our run game laterally. However with us abandoning the run, there was never a real opportunity for this. (NOT DONE)

4) Take Away Quick Passes: We didn’t manage to do this either, as the Cowboys kept the chains moving with timely passes, which also deprived the Eagles pass rush. (NOT DONE)

++++

This week’s Four Things score was 1 of 4. We come back to the Linc on Friday for a pivotal match-up with the Chicago Bears.

****

Game Hero: Not Applicable

Game goat: Head Coach Nick Sirianni – I’m done blaming Offensive Coordinator Kevin Patullo for his ineptitude. I’m not even going to give a list of his failings for this game. By now, Sirianni should have done something about Patullo’s bungling, foolish, predictable, and flat-out unimaginative play-calling. But he hasn’t.

We are still at the head of the NFC East. We have however, fallen behind the Rams for the number one seed in the Conference. This means that this game, and the collapse vs Denver, may rob us of home-field advantage and more importantly, the first round Bye. This is despite beating the Rams, and Lions, and Packers, even with the handicap of Patullo’s… coaching.

On The Whole: We had the Cowboys down 21 – 0 at the half, and couldn’t mount any kind of a scoring drive for the second half of the game. This is after Dallas made their adjustments, of course. To which we apparently made none.

Our Defense battled valiantly, but our Offense kept going three-and-out, and giving the Cowboys opportunity, after opportunity, after opportunity. We had six possessions in the second half, and only managed to get into field goal position ONCE. Which we then missed and set Dallas up with a short field. Three plays later they scored a touchdown.

CB Cooper DeJean should not play on the boundary.

Once we started losing players in the Secondary (CB Adoree Jackson (three tackles); S Reed Blankenship (8 – 0.0 – 1 – 0); and S Andrew Makuba (3 tackles) we had to move NCB Cooper DeJean (7 tackles) to actual CB, and the Cowboys proceeded to roast him alive. If you’ve been wondering why DeJean is a Nickel and doesn’t start on the boundary, it’s because of what I told you in August. For anyone who disagreed with me then, what did you think of Coop tonight?

BRING ON THE BAN, YOU CUNTS!!

Posted by The BEAST on 2025/05/21
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, NFL, Offense, Rants, report, X's and O's. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment
Look at how offsides he is. THAT my dear reader, is called FEAR.

BROTHERLY Shove, forever! I’m a huge fan of the play, but I’m an even bigger fan of the fact that, opposing teams can rarely stop us when we run it. So when I first heard that the NFL was seriously taking a vote to ban the play, I was understandably…upset.

Once again it was a professional sports league, targeting Philadelphia for innovating and perfecting something. Like when the NBA outlawed Allen Iverson’s Crossover dribble , then later outlawed his Spin Cross dribble (sometimes called the El Nino).

This push to ban the Shove, felt unfair and I was very pissed over it. Until recently. Now the more I think about it, the more I find myself, sort of looking forward to the Brotherly Shove being banned. This is because I’m a student of the game. I see its history everywhere, and I can’t wait to see the fallout from this.

Consider Air Coryell. One aspect of that offensive system, was to put receivers into motion, to read if a defense was playing Man or Zone. It was hard to stop when that first came out, but teams caught on, and now you see it as part of every offensive system, on nearly every play.

Consider the original West Coast Offense. Joe Montana and the Forty-Niners virtually owned the 1980’s with that system. Then other teams began to copy it and mutate it. Now almost every team either runs a version of the WCO, or their own system is heavily impacted with basic tenets of the WCO.

(sigh)

Buddy Ryan and Bud Carson invented the 46 Defense, which made legends of Eagles and Bears defenders, from the mid 1980’s through early 1990’s, Then teams caught up to it, and no one runs the 46 any more.

The history of the NFL is innovation, domination, transformation, repeat. Innovation, domination, transformation, repeat.

Except here, no one is figuring out the Brotherly Shove. Teams are just dropping to the floor, going fetal, and screaming “No Mas!” They ran to mommy Goodell, hid behind her skirt, and cried for her to stop the big, bad Eagles. And she said “Roger that.”

If the Shove is banned, it will mean that at least a two-thirds majority of the league’s owners, realized we can’t be stopped on the field, so they ambushed us, off of it. Unlike Air Coryell and the WCO, and the 46, our innovation will go down as having never been solved. With a ban, our ownership of all those teams, will be written indelibly into NFL history itself.

So yeah. I’m kinda looking forward to that silver lining.

ON THE WHOLE

Posted by The BEAST on 2023/11/28
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, Crazy Talk, Defense, Fans, Four Things, Offense, Players, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , . Leave a comment

OFTEN when I write an original draft, if something doesn’t fit right, or I’m not sure how to use it, I’ll move it all the way to the bottom of the draft, then go back up and keep working. So in the originals, there’s sometimes a bunch of leftover stuff at the bottom, that gets totally left out of the article that you read.

I originally wrote this while working on the “On The Whole” segment of Four Things Reviewed: WK 12: Bills. I wanted to be celebratory, but I kept ending up expressing my concerns. Then I would shove those down page, and then write more happy shit.

While I’m grateful for the win, and did want to enjoy the moment, it would be disingenuous of me to not reflect, what many of us are feeling, despite being 10 – 1.

About the game itself, I’m not understanding what’s going on. After the game, WR Devonta Smith was talking with local reporter John Clark, about how we still have yet to play a complete game. WHY??? Who is fucking up so often, and why aren’t they accountable? And why is four quarters of strong effort, too much to ask for?

I’m from Philly, so I have to speak plain on this. I’m sure I’ll get called negative or whatever, but this “Nothing matters as long as we win” attitude, is silly and keeping the team from getting better. In fact, it seems to be getting worse. We didn’t start the season with 10 point halftime deficits, but look at us over the last two games.

We have all four of our starters in the Secondary healthy, as well as our NCB. So we no longer have the injury excuse, yet the coverage issues that we were told would be addressed during the Bye week, still remain. Opponents are still getting the ball out quickly, so the pass rush has deteriorated. If anything it’s gotten worse after the Bye.

I don’t get why we keep running a QB who’s knee is better, but not healed. I don’t get why we don’t give more carries to our RB. I don’t understand why it’s okay that guys who could cover last year, can’t this year. I don’t understand why we make every QB we face, look like vintage Steve Young.

Handing the ball off just 18 times, almost seems like the coaching staff is trying to get our QB hurt again. We’re 10 – 1 and honestly, I’m not sure that we could beat a playoff team, IN the playoffs, right now. We just refuse to play for four quarters!

Again, this was just stuff that I kept pushing down the page, almost as if I was pushing it down inside my mind. Telling myself a form of “Don’t worry be happy.” But I can’t keep quiet about it anymore. This is really starting to spook me. Is any of this bothering any of you?

STOPPING THE BROTHERLY SHOVE.

Posted by The BEAST on 2023/11/11
Posted in: breakdown, Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, NFL, Offense, Rants, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment
The Eagles make #11 (Micah Parsons), body-surf three yards. Backwards.

PHILADELPHIA has designed an unstoppable version of the QB Sneak. Initially, it was referred to as “Snoopy” by the Eagles players, However, since the Eagles didn’t make that known, others around the league, and media detractors of the play, pejoratively called it the “Tush Push”. So a few weeks later some of us fans began circulating the name “Brotherly Shove”, on-line and through word of mouth.

The name made it’s way to Head Coach Nick Sirianni’s ear, at his press conference on September 27th. When Coach heard it, he closed his eyes and nodded his approval.

Lookit that mug! Have you ever seen a more Italian face?! Total classic, right here!

Soon after that, the Eagles began referring to the play, as the Brotherly Shove. Then on October 10th, the organization filed a trademark application for the name.

While some assholes are still using ‘Tush Push’, that name is fading fast. What is not fading fast, is our opponents hatred of it. They see it, and can’t stop it. They try it, and can’t execute it. So now a number of teams have stomped their foot, shit their diapers, and wailed for the play to be banned outright. Awww, poor babies!

They want the NFL to ban it on the grounds that:

1) Someone could get injured running the play – This is based on the giants having two players injured on the same down, while trying to execute the play. It does not take into account, the flagrant stupidity of the giants as an organization. If you asked each man there, to conduct ten separate counts of his own balls, none of them would ever get the same number twice. So banning the Brotherly Shove on that merit, lacks any. Next!

2) Someone could get injured by the play – This is true. That could happen. This is, players also get hurt running regular QB Sneaks; or being tackled legally; or landing from a jump; and let’s not forget all those popped Achilles and ACL tears, which are nearly always the result of no contact plays. So players get hurt playing Football. So quitcherbitchin. Next!

3) Players shouldn’t push the ball carrier from behind – The fuck?! Literally every game you or I have ever seen or played in (involving helmets and pads), has featured a pile being pushed from behind. Seriously, I don’t know how they ban the play based on this, without changing all of Football, and how linemen are coached from Pop Warner, through the Hall of Fame.

4) It’s an ugly play – So is every play run by Washington!

5) It’s more of a Rugby scrum than a football play – STOP!! ! This is some of the most rank bullshit I’ve seen propagated on America, since Little Caesar’s was promoted as food. It’s taking advantage of the fact that most Americans have never seen a game of Rugby, and so don’t know what an actual ‘scrum’ looks like. (I’ve watched it, and even considered joining a local league in my late 30’s.) Here’s an example of a scrum:

THIS…is a Rugby scrum.

Notice the arm and head placements? Now here’s how it usually moves:

Eagles opponents never put up this kind of fight.

The Brotherly Shove looks nothing like those. However, what the Shove has going for it, is that it is clearly a throwback to Football’s Rugby roots. For those who don’t know, Football was invented around 1870, as a refined version of Rugby. The forward pass wasn’t introduced until 1906. So Football looked a lot like Rugby, or Australian Football for almost 40 years.

I do watch Aussie “footy” when I can get it. The West Coast Eagles for mostly obvious reasons.

In addition to the name, Philly’s city colors are blue and gold.

I hate Collingswood because they dress like a team of referees. Incidentally, that sport is also born of Rugby, but it has more Soccer mixed in it. You might actually like it if you stumble across it.

The Brotherly Shove is literally Football returned to it’s beginnings. It’s gone caveman. It’s what happens when Football gets in touch with it’s roots. Gets barefoot, butt naked, and runs in the bush. The Brotherly Shove is primal. It’s hunter gatherer. It’s a fistfight in a phone booth. It’s an 11 man, 3,000 pound masculinity check, that nearly every opponent fails, every time.

And that’s the real reason why they want it banned.

Adelfikos sprochno!

NO PROBLEMS UP FRONT

Posted by The BEAST on 2022/11/20
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, Defense, free agents, Front Office (F.O.), Players, Rants, report, Roster, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment

TWO words: Marlon Tuipulotu.

He’s the DT that the Eagles have put on Injured Reserve. Remember when they carted him off the field on Monday ni-, oh right. They didn’t. The Eagles put him on I.R. on Wednesday the 16th. This is Sunday morning the 20th. Quick! What’s his injury? Anybody? Anybody? His injury is sucking ass, and being pushed aside for two better players, that’s what his injury is. Please! Go to the Eagles website and get the details on this “injury”. I’ll wait…..

Over the last 5 weeks, the Eagles have allowed 124 rushing yards or more, in every game. It got really bad after the Bye week, when we allowed 144, 168, and 152 respectively. Many things factor into that. Not bringing arms to tackle attempts, holding runners up to claw at the ball, tackling shoulders instead of thighs. All of which are quickly correctable.

The biggest reason we’re getting run through however, is because we’re getting beat on the line of scrimmage. The knee jerk from fans, has been to either blame DT Fletcher Cox for falling off, or to blame the injury to DT Jordan Davis. Both are correct, but only in a round about way.

Cox was being asked to play more snaps than usual, as the coaching staff hoped he could fill the hole left by Davis, both as a presence and rotationally. As a result, we’re running Cox into the ground. In fact, we’re using him the opposite of how we should be using a player his age. (More on that in the upcoming Quarterly Report. Yes, it’s late. I know. Bear with me.)

Linval Joseph working the “One Half” technique.
Ndamukong Suh gets a taste of Philly’s sports media.

So the Eagles added 34 year old DT Linval Joseph, and then DT Ndamukong Suh, who is 35. While Joseph is more of a space eater for the run game, Suh is a flat-out disruptor of blocking schemes. Even when he doesn’t make the play, he frequently causes havoc.

Understand, the worst of our run defense has coincided with the ramp up in snaps for Tuipulotu. Over the last three games, he’s averaged 33% of the defensive snaps. And that is not a good thing! I made it clear in last years Draft Report that I didn’t see selecting him as a good move. He stuck anyway.

I repeated my point about Tuipulotu in this year’s Pre-Draft Preview. My specific choice of words: “Marlon Tuipulotu played like trash, with a side order of ass last year,”. Yet he kept seeing the field this year. And the more he did, the more others like Cox were asked to compensate for everything that Tuipulotu can’t do. Which, you know, is pretty much everything.

Cox eats double teams and disrupts the pocket; DT Javon Hargrave is an ‘A’ gap penetrator who gets to QB’s; Davis is a space eating, pocket collapser. Those are our true DT’s. While DT Milton Williams can play that spot, he’s more of a DE/DT tweener. He’s coming along, but we still don’t really know who he is, just yet. Tuipulotu is just a 300 pound guy. Hell, I’M a 300 pound guy! There should be more qualifications than that, to get a roster spot.

When Davis went down, we were left with a bum (Tuipulotu), and two guys who specialize in slipping the point of attack, not holding it. That’s not saying that Cox and Hargrave can’t play the run! We all know that they can. But that’s not where their salary size comes from.

Do you realize that at worst, if Suh and Joseph don’t contribute much as players, those two, plus Cox and Hargrave, will be pouring wisdom into Davis. Meanwhile we have no timetable on Tuipulotu’s return date. Which is totally understandable without an actual injury to assess.

EAGLES TRADE FOR DeMARCUS LAWRENCE?

Posted by The BEAST on 2022/10/22
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, Crazy Talk, Defense, Front Office (F.O.), NFC East, NFL, playoffs, Rivals, Roster, Super Bowl, trade, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment

ARMING for a Super Bowl run. That’s the whole point in making a mid-season trade. It’s getting that last piece, which should put your team over the hump. It’s shoring up a glaring weakness, or giving an obvious strength the Barry Bonds treatment. It’s saying “Damn the consequences. I’m all in!”

Defensive line and pass rush, are already deep and dominant areas for this Eagles team. There isn’t an NFC team that can beat us now. Adding Dallas Cowboys DE DeMarcus Lawrence to this team, would almost act as a reservation to play in the upcoming Super Bowl.

Understand, this move is highly unlikely at the moment. The current NFL playoff structure includes seven teams, three of which are Wild Cards. If the playoffs started today, Dallas would be in as the sixth seed. With playoff hopes still alive, no team is parting ways with a player like Lawrence.

That said, the November 1st trade deadline is two Cowboys games away from now, and currently there are six, 3 – 3 teams in the NFC. The math will turn suddenly and sharply for at least one of these teams. If the the 4 – 2 Cowboys split these next two weeks, they’d be 5 – 3. If they drop both, they’re 4 – 4 with a very murky franchise picture going forward.

Get this: Lawrence is 30 years old, and set to count 35M$ against the 2023 salary cap. He last had a 10 sack season in 2018. Since then, he’s put up 5.0, 6.5, 3.0, and currently sits at 3.0 through six games. This year, that’s half a sack per game. Over seventeen games that projects as just 8.5 sacks, and he’s under contract until 2025, when he’ll be 33.

Hell, with DE’s Chauncey Gholston and Sam Williams waiting in the wings, Cowboys owner Jerry Jones might welcome a chance to dump Lawrence’s contract. Especially if he can get us to cough up a second rounder and fourth rounder in 2023; or a 2023 second, and a 2024 third.

For the Eagles it would also work out well. Part of Lawrence’s production issues have to do with him never having an interior presence like DT Fletcher Cox. With OLB Hasaan Reddick on his left arm, and Cox on his right, there may not be enough players left to block him! Lawrence isn’t a long term building block, but he can be this year’s Chris Long or Michael Bennett, and really help further a playoff run.

As far as figuring out the money, The Eagles are already projected to have a loose estimate of 11M in cap space for 2023; they should have about 10M in rollover; and no one knows exactly what the cap ceiling will be. Also General Manager Howie Roseman can take a bad contract, and turn that water into wine. So if you think of the money as an impediment, DON’T.

I’m writing this on my personal laptop, with my work laptop open to my lock screen. The picture on that screen, is of the Eagles 2018 parade. Super Bowl MVP Nick Foles is holding the trophy in the air, as the bus travels (the wrong way) on 15th Street. Crazy thing is, I’m in this picture. (Don’t look for me. Even I can’t make me out in this shot, and I know exactly where I’m standing in it.)

Super Bowl MVP Nick Foles holds up the Lombardi trophy, in front of the Municipal Services Building. Kevin Bacon’s father Edmund, designed it. FYI: When this was taken, I was standing across the street from it, with no clue that I’d ever work there. I work there now. Life can be funny.

This trade would put us in a real position to see another one of these, at seasons end. Again, this move is highly unlikely at the moment. So share the shit out this article! Spread the rumor! Speak it into existence. We have two weeks to get it to the right set of ears, and maybe make it happen. Be that 12th man, and I’ll see you on in February on 15th Street.

PUTTING A FOOT IN DOUG’S ASS

Posted by The BEAST on 2022/09/27
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Crazy Talk, Fans, Four Things, Front Office (F.O.), Rants, Super Bowl, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . 1 Comment

WHAT’S it like to get a foot in your ass, in a building, with a statue of you in front of it? Well, on Sunday around 5p.m. we should be able to ask former Eagles and current Jaguars Head Coach Doug Pederson. So far he has the Jacksonville Jaguars looking, and playing like a professional football team.

My prediction of course, seems like pure fan speculation. I have yet to even start assembling the Four Things article, for this upcoming game. So I can’t have a grounded sense of how this one will shake out, right? I mean, the Jags have the NFL’s second highest differential (+46) in points scored to points against. The Eagles come in third (+36) in that category.

Given the Eagles tendency to sleepwalk through the second half of football games, and Jacksonville coming alive after the half, this game has all the makings of a nail biter. Predicting a win this early, with no due diligence just seems like talking shit. Right? Perhaps.

But there’s a deeper narrative to this Eagles season.

The NFL schedule makers forcing us to put down Doug, the week after putting down QB Carson Wentz, almost seems cruel. It also portends that Week 11, QB Nick Foles may be starting in place of QB Matt Ryan, on the day that we face head coach Frank Reich’s Colts. (If it happens, don’t be shocked.) Do you see the pattern forming?

The Universe loves irony, and it has a poetic way of punishing those who ignore it. Nick should have stayed in Philly, but took a shaky contract, and had a horrific time in Jacksonville. Both on and off the field. (I often wonder if Philly’s better hospitals could have saved his unborn child.) During Week One, Carson beat Doug, who didn’t stick up for him here. Then last week, we pounded Carson who requested a trade, into the ground. Reich has gone from guru to damned near punchline in Indianapolis.

Now Doug gets to come back, and get a foot in his ass, at the foot of his statue. Everyone connected with the collapse of our Super Bowl team, has had to swallow bitter medicine as a result of their actions immediately following that demise. So clearly Doug has an ass whipping coming.

And don’t think for a moment that General Manager Howie Roseman won’t get his. The Universe doesn’t fuck around when it dishes. At the moment, EVERYTHING Howie does seems like genius. The world can’t pat him hard enough on the back. Which only sets him up for the biggest fall of them all. Gifted with opportunity by the Universe, they each spat in it’s face.

Understand, I’m not saying that the Universe is angry that the Eagles dynasty was shaken down. I highly doubt it cares about football or any sport. What I’m saying, is that a lot of negative energy went into destroying what was constantly advertised, as good men coming together. Hypocrisy. Being a turncoat. Ingratitude. These things scream at Karma in defiance of it. And that only ends one way.

With the Universe putting foot directly to ass.

TAKING THE BROWNS TO THE BOWL

Posted by The BEAST on 2022/07/07
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, Crazy Talk, Players, Super Bowl, trade, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment

WHILE I really couldn’t care any less about the DeShaun Watson situation, I am infinitely curious about how this is going to shake out for the Cleveland Browns. With the NFL gearing up to place Watson on possibly a one year suspension, the Browns have an absolute shit-show on their hands.

(Full disclosure: I wrote this article on June 27th, but I kept balking at publishing it. If the Browns and QB Baker Mayfield had kissed and made-up (and there were stories saying that it could have happened), then this article would look pretty silly. Well now that Cleveland has been dumb enough to trade Mayfield, I can finally release this bad boy.)

Let me catch you up: Cleveland spent twenty-six years without a playoff win; get one with QB Baker Mayfield; do Mayfield dirty, by signing a pervert (Watson) to replace him; and now looks as if they’ll have to play this season without their pervert, or Mayfield. So ladies and gents, I present to you, third string QB Jacoby Brissett!

Big deal, right? All a third string QB does, is set Cleveland up for early draft picks, right? Nope. Cleveland has no first rounders until 2025. So the team has zero motivation to tank for draft position until then. It’s either win or humiliation. As for Brissett, he’s twenty-nine, and on a one year 4.6M$ deal. So an opportunity to start in 2022, is an audition for his 2023.

A closer look at him reveals a 14 – 23 record as a starter for a “less than good” Colts team. It also reveals a career mark of 36 touchdowns against 17 interceptions, with another 13 scores rushing. So he can play. The issue with him has been that his opportunities have always been with crap teams.

Before anyone forgets, the Browns have a pretty good roster. They went 8 – 9 last year, in a division that was won by the 10 – 7 Bengals. Honestly, with the Steelers now grooming a rookie QB, all it would take for the Browns to win the AFC North, would be an injury to Bengals QB Joe Burrow, and the Ravens continuing to be predictable.

Two years ago, Cleveland went to Kansas City and lost by just five points, in the Divisional round of the 2020 playoffs. This is largely still that roster. If the Browns made the playoffs this year, and suddenly got hot… Hey, weirder has happened.

My question is this: What if the Browns fuck up and succeed? What would the Browns do next year, if Brissett gets the Browns to The Show this year? What if they actually win it behind him? Where would that leave Watson? Remember, this team has no first rounder next year, so this year they have no reason not to go all in. Their QB needs this season, to possibly still have a career in a year. So a lot is at stake.

I don’t have any speculation for what the Browns might do. While the factors for a deep playoff run are all easily possible, it’s their aligning, all at the right time, that is highly unlikely. That said, a competent QB, plus a good roster, and a tight division, equals a chance.

Dear Browns fans, your team could very well stumble towards greatness in 2022. Just kidding! All it would take is a little errant luck, and your DeShaun Watson shit-show, could become a full-blown shit-nado. I hope you all brought a towel, because it’s almost time for you to…

This is going to sound weird to Browns fans, but did you know that most NFL fan bases look forward to football season? C’mon over. Let’s get you out of that abusive relationship. What’s happening to you, is not normal.

THE NFL VS EAGLES PLAYOFF HOPES

Posted by The BEAST on 2021/12/18
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, Crazy Talk, Fans, NFC East, NFL, playoffs, Rants, Rivals, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment

THIS is some bullshit!! Our game against the Washington Redskins (don’t bother complaining), was postponed for two days, from Sunday to Tuesday. My biggest gripe with this is pretty the same gripe that every Eagles fan has: It robs us of two days rest and prep on the back-end for the giants game next Sunday.

If we were tanking and just running down the season, it wouldn’t matter and none of us would care. However, we are trying to make a push to qualify for the playoffs. In fact, as of today it’s still mathematically possible (though highly unlikely) that we could win the division. So anything that rocks our boat, acts as a hindrance to that effort.

What makes this so heinous, is that this hindrance was a deliberate act, handed down from the league itself. Worse, is the felling that we are being punished for the Redskins irresponsibility, while they seem to be receiving a form of clemency for it.

And honestly, what is to be gained from giving Washington two more days? They didn’t start tagging players until Tuesday the 14th. The quarantine period is 10 days. Tuesday the 21st is just 7 days from the earliest diagnoses. Some players weren’t popping until Friday the 17th. That’s just FOUR days. The CDC itself says that these windows wouldn’t be wide enough.

Players need two negative tests in 48 hours to return. If they were being watched for exposure, that’s one thing, but for those INFECTED, they can’t come back on Tuesday. They still have to quarantine because they may still be shedding virus, regardless of what the tests say about their infection state. Virus can be shed over a period of 8 – 31 days.

So the Redskins get no additional benefit from the two days. At best, all it does is slow US down.

Back in the Summer, the NFL declared that teams who didn’t follow proper protocols, and had outbreaks of Covid among their players and coaches, faced possible forfeitures as a consequence. Well, the instant that was tested, that policy flew right out the window.

Understand, the NFL is currently discussing moving other games as well. So it’s entirely possible that the giants game could also be moved. However, that ripple of a short week WILL show up in the next four. Given that we’re at the low-end of a playoff push, and ALL FOUR of these games are against division opponents, this is some ultimate fuckery.

This is some bullshit!

BACK-UP QB JALEN HURTS

Posted by The BEAST on 2021/12/01
Posted in: Conspiracy Corner, Conversations, Crazy Talk, Front Office (F.O.), NFL, Offense, Players, Roster, stats, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , . 1 Comment

JALEN Hurts won’t be a franchise quarterback. Let me say that up top, in plain and unbroken English. I told you that in June after 4 starts, in October after 10 starts, and in November after 13 starts. Now, 16 starts into his NFL career, I’m saying it again: Jalen Hurts will not, because he cannot, be a franchise QB.

The timing of this article couldn’t have been better. I told some friends (Andrea and Arlette), last week that I would write about this subject. Thanksgiving got in the way, and so I had to delay it. Turns out, that was for the best. Events during this last game have sharpened the points I’m about to make.

Over the last four weeks as the Eagles were piling up rushing yardage, most fans were satisfied. So long as Hurts was running for touchdowns, and leading the team in rushing, no one but me seemed to care that his game as a passer, kept being extremely pedestrian.

Detroit: 9/14 – 64.2% – 103 – 0 – 0. Los Angeles: 11/17 – 64.7% – 162 – 1 – 0. Denver: 16/23 – 69.5% – 178 – 2 – 1. (I won’t pick on the day Hurts had vs the giants. We know how that went.)

But let’s look at the Saints game, which we won in a blowout. Specifically, the stat line put up by Saints QB Trevor Siemian (22/40 – 55.0% – 214 – 3 – 2), vs the stat line by Hurts (13/24 – 54.1% – 147 – 0 – 0).

Siemian was slightly more accurate, got his supporting cast involved, and so, he nearly led a rally. This is despite being a third stringer, without his team’s starting RB, #1 WR, and BOTH Offensive Tackles. Hurts had none of these disadvantages, yet it can be argued that Siemian had a better day as a QB. Especially in regards to getting his teammates involved.

Teammates is another bone I have to pick with Hurts. I keep hearing about how he’s a field general. I keep hearing how he’s focused and competitive. However, during games, especially when we’re down, when I see him on the sideline…he’s just sitting there.

He’s not looking at the tablet. He’s not rallying the crowd. He’s not on one knee, talking to the O-line about protection slides. He’s not in the Offensive Coordinator’s ear, or standing next to his Head Coach. He’s not having an animated discussion about what he sees, to get on the same page with the receivers. He’s just sitting there, looking like he’s sucking on a lemon.

I say this as a man who’s worn pads and has played with multiple QB’s. Jalen’s body language sucks ass. Nothing about him says “Follow ME!” or “I got you.” His swagger is limited to him running for a touchdown. It doesn’t extend to his teammates.

For example, when LT Jordan Mailata pancaked Saints DE Marcus Davenport (because of his treatment of Hurts), was there an acknowledging fist bump or high-five from the QB? Nope. Hurts texted his thanks to Mailata, later that night. A text message! In exchange for sticking up for him! But when Hurts needed consoling after the giants game:

1,000 words, right?

BUT WAIT!!! THERE’S MORE!!!

Hurts may miss the Jets game with a sore ankle. I’ll say that one more time: Hurts may miss the Jets game with a sore ankle. Remember the three touchdowns QB Donovan McNabb threw against the Cardinals in November of 2002, on a broken ankle? Remember QB Carson Wentz tearing his ACL, and staying in one more play, to throw a touchdown vs the Rams, in our 2017 Super Bowl season?

Sore ankle. Those are the words of Head Coach Nick Sirianni. 

I guess benching Hurts is the Eagles way of admitting that he’s a liability if he has to play from the pocket. Seriously. Would a sore ankle shelve Tom Brady? Ben Roethlisberger? Patrick Mahomes? Matt Stafford and Derek Carr have both played through back injuries. How about Brett Favre? Dan Marino played with TWO knee braces. Hell, “sore” never stopped Wentz from suiting up. Is Hurts more delicate than Wentz?

I’m not going to get into Hurts being inaccurate. I won’t mention how he’s slow to read defenses. I won’t mention that he’s ineffective running anything other than a one read system. I won’t mention that when the going got tough in college, he got going to another college, instead of overcoming the challenger.

Did I mention that so far he’s 0 – 4 vs the NFC East? That includes two blowouts vs the Cowboys. They humiliate us every time he starts against them. And of course all he could manage vs the giants, was 7 points. And we tanked against the Redskins, in a game that we were already losing. Like I said, 0 – 4.

I’ll simply ask: Is THIS your leader? Is this the face that you want to represent YOU? My answer is on his shirt, and even Rosa agrees with me.

That’s not to say that Hurts has no place in the NFL. I told you in June that the NFL was moving towards QB being a platoon type position. I told you in September, a week before the season started, that QB Gardner Minshew would play this year, somewhere around Week 8. He played in Week 8.

I’m going to say Hurts has a place in the NFL as a QB. Just not as a franchise. Not even as the Ace QB of a platoon. Think of him as a relief QB. Start thinking of him, as a back-up.