DO you have Foleseosis (Foles-EE-Oh-sis)?
- Do you find yourself screaming “But Foles is 14 – 4 under Kelly!” almost daily?
- Are you exhausted from screeching “7 touchdowns against the Raiders!” as if that mattered?
- When Foles 2014 season sends you mail, do you leave it in a drawer, unopened?
If you answered YES to any of these questions, you my friend may have a mild case of Foleseosis. It’s a condition that manifests when a fan is 120% behind a player that the Head Coach won’t publicly back, and the Owner has already thrown under the bus.
Unfortunately it can and it does get worse. Full-blown symptoms include:
- An inability to notice that Foles is hampering the run game
- Inventing excuses for pass after pass thrown off his back foot
- Making excuses for why he plays poorly vs good teams
- Conveniently forgetting performances like oh, I don’t know…Jacksonville maybe?
With full-blown Foleseosis, it’s not that you can’t stand up, it’s that you keep standing up for the wrong thing. Namely Nick Foles being the Eagles starter.
But there is HOPE my friends! Wait…No there isn’t. If Foles as the starter is your ideal situation, then your heart is about to be shattered. That possibility exploded when Foles broke his shoulder against Houston. That popping, snapping, breaking noise Foles heard, was his chance to make 12M$ or better per year. He is a journeyman QB in waiting now. All he’s waiting for is the day the Eagles shake his hand and carry his shit outside in a Hefty bag. And it could come sooner than you care to think.
I don’t know what’s worse. This or Mariotamania.