THIS game was somewhat lopsided.
EAGLES 0 – Patriots 35
EAGLES STATS:
New categories include an EXCLUSIVE weekly Offensive Line Report (Rushing TD’s – 3rd and 4th downs converted of 2 yards or less – sacks allowed); as well as Drive Killer (Int – FR – 4th down Tackles – FF).
Passing: (S) QB Joe Flacco – (10/17 – 58.8% – 83 – 0 – 1)
Rushing: (B) RB Elijah Holyfield – (4 – 31 – 7.7 – 0 – 0)
Receiving: (B) TE Jack Stoll – (7 – 4 – 33 – 8.2 – 0)
Offensive Line Report: (0 – 1 – 4)
Drive Killer: (B) CB Kevon Seymour – (0 – 1 – 0 – 0)
Sack Leader: No Qualifier
I hear you asking, “What about all the stuff that stats don’t reveal?” Well, that’s the reason for the Four Things articles. It’s to point out what we need to address BEFORE the game. Then AFTER the game, there’s a no-bullshit assessment of whether or not the Eagles did any of what they needed to do, to ensure the win.
So how much of what I mentioned in Four Things: Patriots, did the Eagles get around to doing? Well let’s see:
1) Run the ball: The play selection this week was 27 passes to 17 non-QB runs. That play-calling is 61.3% pass to 38.7% run. The hope was for 43% at least. The result is that we didn’t keep the defense honest. As a result they pinned their ears back, and hunted our QBs to the tune of 4 sacks.
The idea was that the extra running would loosen the focus on QB Jalen Hurts. It would allow him room to operate, and thus make him more dangerous. However, with him going to a hospital with a case of the shits, no amount of running would have helped him in this game. (NOT DONE)
2) Rotate, rotate, rotate: The rotation of the Defensive Line was better this week, but it still wasn’t great. Also, at one point, LB Alex Singleton repeatedly looked to the sideline and patted his helmet, to let them know he needed a breather. This is unacceptable. Gassed players will not/cannot, reliably make plays. This inattention to defensive player stamina, has to get fixed. If not, we’re going to give up a lot of cheap touchdowns. It will get us destroyed this year.

Like it did in this game. (NOT DONE)
3) Sit the Flacco Down: Flacco started. Even worse, he got more passing plays called for him, than QB Nick Mullens did. This is despite Mullens coming into the game, already down three scores. (NOT DONE)
4) Unleash the blitz: The only way we could have gotten less pressure on Patriot QB’s, would have been to help block for them. No one on our D-line was able to get within a $20 cab ride of the opposing passers. So of course we dialed up clever blitzes, right? RIGHT?! Not at all. (NOT DONE)
So that’s us, doing goose egg out of Four Things this week. Next week we get the Jets, in their house, and I’m afraid.
I’m not afraid of the Jets. I’m afraid of watching another exhibition game devolve into another shit show, because this coaching staff has it in for the fans here.
On The Whole:
To eloquently quote Steve Coogan in ‘Hamlet2’:

Remember when I told you that Head Coach Nick Sirianni’s talk about “competition” was a lie? Well it’s pretty hard for players to compete, when they don’t even have to play a single snap. Or for fuck’s sake, even put on their pads! Like I said, Siranni’s line about competition… It was total bullshit, wasn’t it?
When a team finishes 4 – 11 – 1, nobody on the roster is good enough to sit out a preseason game. Especially when breaking in new systems. At this point I don’t know which I’m more displeased by, the players inability to win downs, or the coaching staff appearing clueless, over-matched and inept at every turn.